Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
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