Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
Randomize
