I think i sorta joined a cult last night
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Randomize
