Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
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