thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
Randomize
