Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
Randomize
