So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
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