you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Randomize
