she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
You might have been able to redeem yourself had you not referred to grandma as "this bitch".
That explains the hand print on my face. That old lady knows how to throw a punch.
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
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