It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Randomize