He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Randomize