So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
Randomize
