Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
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