i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Randomize
