Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
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