she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
