i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
Randomize
