I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Randomize
