paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
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