You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
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