My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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