the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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