let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
Randomize
