He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
