Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
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