Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
Randomize
