Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
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