I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Randomize
