yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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