She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
Princesses don't give blow jobs
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
Randomize
