THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize