arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Randomize
