HIV tests are more positive than that guy
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
Randomize
