He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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