can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
