I think I died a long time ago.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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