Where is the hickey?
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
