Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
I have fence marks all over my body
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
Randomize