She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
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