Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
Randomize
