Her vagina should come with caution tape.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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