I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
We need to feng shui this bitch.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
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