I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
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