ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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