Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Randomize
