I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
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