Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
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