Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
Randomize
