omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
Randomize