I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
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