those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
Randomize