how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
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